It’s one of those things that can just creep up on you. Sneaks up on you while you’re about to take a shower. Or, when you are on your way to work. Or, in the middle of the night, in your dreams. Or, while you’re at a wedding and the DJ plays a familiar song. All of these have happened to me this past week. It’s like that guest that doesn’t realize that they have overstayed their welcome – even though you never invited them over in the first place.
As I was scrolling through my old pictures looking for a food picture (fish tacos) to show my husband, I scrolled past her face.
Her smiling face. Arms draped over my mom and aunt’s shoulders.
The grief of losing someone close to you is something inexplicable. My grandmother was the adhesive that bonded us all together. And since she’s been gone, sometimes it feels like our family is a piece of tape that has been pulled up and reapplied one too many times. It just doesn’t feel as sticky.
I just want everyone to know that it’s okay to mourn your loved ones. People will always say, “it’s going to be alright.” “With time it gets better.” “Just pray about it.” – all very well meaning sentiments that do not even come close to taking the sting of the loss away.
Not until you have felt the pain yourself will you ever really understand what I mean. It’s rough.
However, I’m so thankful that I serve a merciful God that provides a peace that surpasses all understanding. A God that holds me in the midst of my grief with spiritual arms and a resonating voice that says, “I got you!” Oh, how reassuring it is to know that those same arms that hold me here, holds my grandma in heaven.
Sweet Jesus, but it doesn’t take away the pain.
Lord, we need you. We that are feeling the pain and waves of grief that comes with the loss of a loved one. Hold us God. Rock us in your arms and give us peace in the midst of our overwhelming grief. We rest assured that our loved ones that placed their faith and trust in you are sitting at your feet. They’re in eternity worshipping you and waiting to greet us one day with open arms. But, Lord until that day…keep us sane God. Keep our eyes set on you. Keep our minds reminiscent of the precious memories we shared.